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To fight an epidemic of childhood obesity, Barack Obama has just created a federally-funded obesity taskforce and has given first lady Michelle Obama the job of spearheading publicity efforts. To kick things off, she declared that obesity is "a threat to national security," though she presumably feels that Ronald McDonald should be tried in a civilian court rather than being shipped to Guantanamo Bay.
Michelle will help kids by encouraging them to exercise ("Touch your toes like you're bowing to Japanese royalty!"), eat more fruits and vegetables ("A day without arugula is like a day without sunshine!"), and presumably by giving them fashion tips...
BONUS: From the Hope n' Change Gift Shoppe, a tribute to the first lady and the Beatles!
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