If it's true that a sucker is born every minute, Barack Obama is not only the "man of the hour," he's quite possibly either the biggest sucker...or biggest con-artist...of the century.
How else to explain his recent admission that "there's no such thing as a shovel-ready project," after spending nearly a trillion taxpayer dollars on these figments of his imagination?
While disappointed to admit that investing in non-existent shovel-ready jobs was perhaps the most expensive financial blunder in history, the president has a number of solid fallback plans with which to bolster the U.S. economy.
He's directed Michelle Obama and "those fat kids" to plant money trees in the Whitehouse garden... Obamacare dental clinics are collecting teeth to put under the president's pillow for the tooth fairy... and a nationwide search is taking place for geese which lay golden eggs (although there's concern that members of the president's party may immediately kill them to get the "gold inside.")
And as for the $800 billion spent on shovels, well...they'll soon be used to bury the political careers of a lot of Democrats.
Keep shoveling; it will take 11,407,945 years.
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